Oh, my little droogies….lest you think I have forsaken the American Football Conference, I hereby put forth my pathetic prophetic ponderings.

AFC West

1. San Diego–If they can stay healthy and keep from getting busted for steroids San Diego is again set up as the class of the division. It should be interesting to see how the team responds to year two under Norv Turner. Phillip Rivers is the wildcard. If he ups his game, the Chargers could hoist the Lombardy Trophy. But I doubt it.

2. Denver–I like Cutler, and the running game. And I think Shanahan is a good coach. But somehow the sum has been less than the sum of the parts for the Broncos lately. I see them contending, but not making the playoffs.

3. Oakland–You don’t know how it hurts me to pick an Al Davis team anywhere other than last place. But I like the defense for the most part. And I love the tandem of Darren McFadden and Michael Bush. They could turn back around and be the worst team in the league like they were two years ago, or they could finish 9-7. Somewhere in between is likely.

4. Kansas City–The wear is taking its toll on Larry Johnson, and they got rid of their best pass rusher. I don’t see a lot of upside. But, I didn’t last year either and they got the wildcard after everyone else played dead. So, who knows?

AFC North

1. Pittsburgh–Rothliesberger is underrated and they have a great rookie back in Mendenhall. If they can right the defensive ship after a late season swoon in ‘07 they should be the class of the division once again.

2. Cleveland–They have a lot of tools, and they added Donte Stallworth. But Derrek Anderson sucked in the first pre-season game. So it might end up on the shoulders of Brady Quinn after all. if that happens they won’t finish second, because the turmoil they’d have to go through to reach that decision would leave them in the dust of some of the other AFC powers.

3. Cincinnati–Much to my chagrin, this will be Marvin Lewis’ last year, another 8-8, 7-9 campaign filled with squandered opportunities and unfortunate soundbites. After this season, everyone that can leave will be out of Cincy like a jailbreak.

4. Baltimore–Their good players are older than dirt. I root for Troy Smith. I think he deserves a chance to do what Kyle Boller has proven he can’t do, be an NFL QB. They will lose 20-13 week in and week out. They will cause a lot of pain, but won’t win much.

AFC South

1. Jacksonville–I’m going out on a limb here, but I think the Jags matured a lot last year under Garrard’s leadership. They may be the most intimidating team in the league, but they had key losses on the D-line to overcome.

2. Indianapolis–What can you say? I love the way they carry themselves. And last year, I liked the way they played D. Bob Sanders is incredible. But in preseason Peyton Manning, Dwight Freeney, Bob Sanders, and Marvin Harrison are all struggling to get over injuries and get in playing shape. My prediction is that they get off more slowly than usual and never quite catch up to the Jags.

3. Houston–I don’t know anything about them really. Does anyone? Andre Johnson plays for them right? Anyway, I was able to notice they were a much improved team last year, and competed for the last playoff spot, so I’ll give them some props.

4. Tennessee–I like the Titans, but I just am not sold on Vince Young. He is a physical freak, but can he do the other things that the position of quarterback calls for. His NFL history says no. There’s no doubt he’s a winner, but his body also started to let him down last year. I’m pessimistic about this year, but they could finish in third and get a wildcard if all goes well.

AFC East

1. New England–Duh!! That’s the biggest no-brainer in the last twenty years. This will not be a run at history. !4-2 will be as good as it gets. But it will more than likely result in another World Championship for the Boston area. Because I believe that Belichick was handcuffed a little by the drive for the undefeated season. You could see it wearing on the team as domination turned into escape after escape. This year they’ll just lose early and get that out of the way. A normal season building in Belichick’s good time toward  the Super Bowl.

2. New York–Favre will make a difference, but I don’t think they will be as good as they think they are. 10-6 will be as good as they can hope for. 8-8 is more likely.

3. Buffalo–Perennially competitive. 7-9, but not enough oomph to get over the hump.

4. Miami–At QB you see the last thing you want to see in this part of Florida–a dangling Chad. (I couldn’t resist, unfortunately.) The dangling refers to Pennington’s arm. Then of course you have the Pineapple Express, Ricky Williams, who will no doubt get at least 300 yards before he quits again. Then you have the over inflated Tuna/Whale/Dolphin running the show. This team smells like dead fish already.

AFC Power Rankings.

1. New England

2. Pittsburgh

3. San Diego

4. Jacksonville

5. Indianapolis

6. Cleveland

7. Denver

8. New York

9. Houston

10. Tennessee

11. Cincinnati

12. Buffalo

13. Oakland

14. Kansas City

15. Baltimore

16. Miami